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Marriage counselling is an area of expertise that requires a lot of patience not just from the client’s side but also from the counsellor, a marriage is a connection or a relationship between two people that decided to commit to each other for a long term, it is bound to have disagreements, fights and situations where both the partners will feel lost and confused, however therapy is a way to navigate through a tough time like that.
Having a middle person listen and validate your concerns can be a great way of dealing with your emotions, thoughts and certain behavioral patterns. Providing marital therapy : which is a very sensitive and delicate practice can be sometimes challenging for both the parties involved as it can promote feelings that were hidden or not talked about to come to surface, keeping in mind that this is absolutely normal and natural.
Fundamental techniques in marital therapy
The communication process is the main focus of the fundamental techniques of marital therapy. Active listening is a technique used by counselors.
“Cinematic immersion” is another technique that is employed. One significant similarity between these approaches is that they assist counselors in establishing a secure space where both partners can communicate their emotions and listen to those of the other.
EFT-C, or emotionally focused treatment for couples, is also utilized. This is grounded in attachment theory and use emotion as both a target and a change agent.
Another technique that is employed is behavioral couples therapy. In fact, it is a tried-and-true method of resolving marital conflict.
Some concepts of acceptance and change therapy are also used.
Is Marriage Counselling Effective?
Research on marriage counselling shows promise. According to research conducted by the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT),
Over 98% of couples who attempt marriage counseling say that their sessions are “good” or “excellent.”
Ninety percent of couples who seek marriage counseling report an improvement in their emotional well-being.
After obtaining counseling, two-thirds report improvements in their physical health.
Counseling can be beneficial whether you’ve been together for two months or twenty years, but many couples find that marriage therapy works well. According to studies, relationship troubles are often caused by communication problems, such as ineffective conflict resolution or a lack of constructive communication. Before serious conflicts arise, counseling can assist in resolving these problems.
When is the right time to get marital therapy?
Avoiding communication or communicating negatively typically entails using foul language, verbally abusing others, and occasionally abusing someone physically.
If both couples desire to work out the problems in their relationship and seek out other sexual partners, marital therapy can save a marriage following an affair.
When there is a lack of intimacy where even talking about sex can seem awkward or asking for too much or even just not feeling physical attraction towards your partner, therapy can facilitate an environment for partners to make the effort to keep the spark alive.
The process of marriage counseling takes a long time. Additionally, keep in mind that it cannot save an irreparably damaged marriage. Therefore, seek marital therapy with the intention of doing what is best for both you and your spouse.
However some indicators that suggest when we should take marriage counselling, may not be big issues or big conflicts or fights, there can be something as small as not talking after a conflict about the conflict, or giving each other silent treatment and then start to casually start talking the next day, small things make a big difference when it comes to relationships.
The relationship counselor’s role
Typically, a couple therapist holds a degree in counseling or clinical psychology. Her main responsibility is to listen, comprehend, and help the couple communicate more effectively. Additionally, the counselor:
- offers a confidential space that normalizes emotions.
- makes it possible for each partner to hear themselves and be heard.
- serves as a mirror to show the couples the challenges of the marriage.
- explains the direction and possibility of change.
- provides crucial information and enhances communication
- identifies the pattern of recurring, unfavorable interactions that fuel a troubled marriage.
- recognizes the emotional origin of that unfavorable trend
- increases the emotional attachment between partners by rearranging these important emotional reactions to counteract the pattern and establishing new interactional patterns.
Who Needs to Seek Marriage Counselling?
Despite being referred to as “marriage counseling,” as we have shown, counseling is not only for individuals who have previously tied the knot. The methods employed in marriage counseling and couples therapy don’t differ significantly. Regardless of their relationship situation, anyone can get treatment. The following individuals can gain from marriage counseling:
- Couples who are straight
- LGBT couples
- Couples that are engaged
- Couples in a romantic relationship
- Long-distance couples in relationships
- Couples in open marriages or relationships
- Couples that have split up
You will be invited to talk about your goals for the session when your couples counselling has had a chance to get to know you better. After that, you can decide which objectives you want to focus on.
Having a professional, unbiased and trained therapist can do wonders to the therapeutic process of dealing with your concerns, thus choose your therapist wisely.
“Marriage counseling can be beneficial for those who’ve used psychoeducational resources with little success; for couples who find themselves fighting until it’s harmful to their quality of life; for couples looking to have a mediator help them decide their best options; for couples whose fights feel repetitive and have changed very little over time; or for couples contemplating separation and/or divorce.”
